Joy of Life

They chatted casually for a while and Fan Xian took this opportunity to once again bring up the suggestion of having his grandmother come with him to Jingdou to enjoy her old age. However, like before, the old woman used silence to directly express her attitude.

Fan Xian couldn’t help but sigh and said, “You won’t go no matter what?”

The old mistress knew he was talking about Dong’er and her family. She smiled and said, “Living in Jingdou...is too difficult. Furthermore, Dong’er and you are so close. Don’t forget, the serving girls that grew up with you have all been taught by you to have lofty ambitions and are very unyielding. There is nothing anyone can do.”

Fan Xian rubbed his head, thinking it was indeed the truth. Now, Xiao Ya who still remained in the manor was the smallest of those who had followed him. He could tell that her mouth would be a ruthless one that would show no mercy. There was also Xiao Qing, who had brought her husband back to the manor to visit him. Xiao Qing’s husband was a scholar with merit to his name. But, in the end, he barely dared to breathe loudly in front of Xiao Qing.

Xiao Qing and Xiao Ya were like this, not to mention Dong’er and the always impudent Sisi. These serving girls in the manor had been spoiled by him and taught badly. Anywhere they went, they would be stubborn and did not care about the rules that govern the logic of this world. Although they appeared to be gentle and easygoing, their hearts were forthright.

As Fan Xian thought, he began to smile contentedly. Even if he couldn’t change this world too much, at least he had changed the thoughts and lives of a few women. That wasn’t too bad. Of course, they had to be his girls to be able to enjoy this benefit. If they didn’t have him as a mountain of support behind them, the tempers of these four girls would make their journeys in the world difficult.

One night of silence.

The next day, a piece of news came into Danzhou. Some young master in some manor had been kicked and had spat out bowls of blood. An urgently found doctor managed to save him, and now he was lying in bed groaning.

No one had seen the culprit. Danzhou’s folkways had always been simple, peaceful, and kind. The people were also honest at heart and not violent. News like a noble young master being beaten had never been heard of before.

The entirety of Danzhou was shocked. The Zhizhou was greatly angered and prepared to investigate the case properly to give his predecessor and teacher a great deal of face. When his advisor edged closer and said some things into his ears, the Zhizhou immediately became calm and returned to his meditation room at home to drink tea.

The clever people in Danzhou began to slowly guess at the whole story of this incidence, but no one dared discuss it too much. While the young master who was hit certainly felt anger and resentment in his heart, he didn’t dare cry loudly for justice. On the contrary, he respectfully dispatched someone to Dong’er’s little courtyard and offered up with both hands the medical fees for the past two years and compensation.

The matter quieted down quickly. The Danzhou people knew that the young master of the Fan family was not one who liked to cause trouble. He was one to protect his shortcomings, and so they were not worried.

After a few more days, a secret edict from Jingdou and a Council report from Jiangnan were delivered at the same time to the Count’s manor. Fan Xian lowered his head and read the two thin pieces of paper. He knew that this visit to Danzhou had reached an end. He couldn’t help a glimmer of reluctance to leave welling up in his heart.

After all, he was the Commissioner of the Overwatch Council and a full imperial envoy of Jiangnan Road. Furthermore, he was still young and healthy. He couldn’t be like Chen Pingping and stay in a place he liked to nurture his old age.

Although Danzhou was good, he would eventually have to leave.

In the morning of the next day, Teng Zijing took Lin Da Bao and the Third Prince open-sea fishing once more while Fan Xian finally fulfilled his promise to Wan’er. Taking her little hand, they used slow steps to walk across Danzhou’s earth, enjoying the air. They undertook a rich one-day Danzhou trip.

After the couple had disguised themselves slightly, they went to the bustling marketplace and beach beside the docks to see the beautiful white birds that Hong Changqing deeply hated. They told some stories sitting behind the back door of the Count’s manor. Only then did they go to that very quiet junk shop.

Wan’er smiled warmly the whole way, allowing her husband to take her hand and walk sometimes fast and sometimes slow. She knew all of this was part of Fan Xian’s best memories. He had brought her today because he wanted her to be able to share in the warmest and best parts of his heart.

Inside the junk shop, it was silent. The dust was still just as thick.

Both of them were lazy people, so naturally, they were too lazy to clean. They just stood in the room and looked around, talking about past matters.

Wan’er silently listened to Fan Xian’s rueful memories of his childhood and couldn’t stop a tremor in her heart. She thought that not only was her own childhood in the Palace tense and dangerous, her husband’s childhood, other than being happy, was also very difficult and hard.

Her hand held the cleaver gently, and she smiled slightly. “So uncle used this knife to slice up radishes to go with your drink?”

Fan Xian smiled happily and nodded.

Wan’er glared at him and said, “To be drinking liquor at such a young age, are you not afraid of getting drunk?”

Fan Xian smiled and didn’t say anything.

Lin Wan’er’s eyes suddenly widened and she asked, “Where is the precipice you trained on? Does it have as a steep incline as the one on Cang Mountain? Can you take me to see?”

Fan Xian started and said, “That place is dangerous. You can’t get up there.”

Lin Wan’er gave a sound of understanding, but her smooth face clearly showed a strong disappointment.

Fan Xian looked at her and suddenly said, “Hold me tight.”

Lin Wan’er was startled but then laughed. She put her hands over Fan Xian’s shoulders and held on tightly, just like that night in bed. It was as if she was afraid he would disappear just and even more afraid that he would sink into the Danzhou air.

On the high precipice beside the Danzhou seashore, Fan Xian and Lin Wan’er stood beside the precipice hand in hand. A few steps forward was the abyss, the sea, and flakes of snow.

The sea breeze washed over them. The sun above them seemed, on the contrary, further away than when they were on the ground. The halo of light was lightly covered and did not appear to be burning so fiercely.

Wan’er’s breathing was slightly panicked. Her face was red, while her eyes were slightly fearful. The entire way, she had been carried up the cliff by Fan Xian. It had truly been the most stimulating experience of her life. Those wet, slippery, and precipitous cliffs...she had no idea how she had gotten up. Suddenly, she was standing on the side of the precipice and did not feel very scared as she was a bit numb.

She glanced somewhat fearfully at the distant Danzhou and found that with her sight, she couldn’t clearly see the appearances of the private residences.

She turned her head again and glanced at the calm looking Fan Xian. She opened her mouth and quietly said, “...in the past...you climbed it every day?”

“Yes,” Fan Xian smiled slightly and said. “I started from six, or was it seven? I can’t remember anymore. in any case, other than myself and uncle, you are the third person to come here.”

Lin Wan’er lowered her head and stuck out her tongue. She knew this was one of Fan Xian’s biggest secrets. To be brought here by him...a glimmer of sweetness rose in the girl’s heart, which quickly turned into a glimmer of bitterness. She slowly leaned against Fan Xian’s shoulder and said, “I always thought my life in the Royal Palace was hard. Only now do I know that you had it even worse than me.”

To be forced to climb a mountain at such a young age, what was its purpose? Naturally, it was because he was worried someone wanted to kill him. To grow up in such a terrifying atmosphere, how torturous it would have been for the boy back then. Thinking of this, Wan’er felt a sliver more sympathy for the man next to her that seemed incomparably strong.

Fan Xian smiled slightly, “What hardships were there? If I didn’t want to die, I had to be hardworking. In reality...compared to other people in this world, you and I are can be thought to have grown up in a honeypot. Don’t lightly speak of hardships. At least we don’t have to worry about whether or we will have a next meal, whether or not we have clothes, or whether or not we will be sold by our parents to brothels to be prostitutes or servants.”

Wan’er listened quietly.

“My confidence and ease...are all acted.”

Fan Xian looked at the golden light on the surface of the sea and let his mind wander. “Actually, you should know, I can be considered the person who lives the most carefully, most diligently, and works the hardest in the world.”

Wan’er nodded. Even on the night of their marriage, during that time in Cang Mountain, Fan Xian did not forget his twice daily cultivation. In reality, for someone at Fan Xian’s current realm and power, there was absolutely no need for him to work so hard. People usually only saw the bright and beautiful side to Sir Fan junior, but they never thought about how much sweat and work he put into it.

“I’ve been like this ever since I was young,” Fan Xian said slowly. “No one could understand why I was so exacting with myself.”

Wan’er only understood a little, so she listened quietly.

Fan Xian stopped for a moment. Slowly closing his eyes, he faced the Danzhou sea breeze and said, “Actually, the reason is very simple...I don’t want to die.

“I don’t want to die.”

“Just like what I used to say when I was little...only after getting drunk does one know the depth of passion, and only after death does one know the value of life. A person who has not died cannot know how terrifying death is.”

“I want to live on in this world, so I have to be ruthless, so I must make myself strong.”

Fan Xian continued, “Furthermore, you have no idea that once you have grown used to lying in bed without moving, unable to even move a single finger...when suddenly heaven gives you another chance to move, you would be endlessly grateful and would revel in playing like crazy.”

He was drunk on the memories of his two lives. Beside him, Wan’er could not understand anything she heard. She looked with some confusion at his handsome face and saw a maturity and tragedy that did not befit his age suddenly appear on his face. Her heart moved and ached. A glimmer of unexplainable sorrow welled in her heart along with Fan Xian’s.

Wan’er’s eyes were slightly wet, and she found it difficult to remain on her feet. She pulled at the corner of her sleeve and helped Fan Xian wipe clean the corner of his eyes.

...

...

The visit to Danzhou to see relatives ended like this. However, before they left, Fan Xian went into the old mistress’ study and talked with her for a while. Concerning the news that came from Jingdou, the two seemingly warm and gentle grandmother and grandson were actually the coldest people carrying out a serious conversation.

When he left the study, Fan Xian’s expression was somber.

Returning to his room, Wan’er carefully asked, “What happened?”

“Nothing major.” Fan Xian thought for a while then calmly said, “It is natural for the Imperial Censorate to upbraid me in court. As a Jiangnan Road imperial envoy, I have run off to Danzhou to play, which is certain to annoy many people. What is important is that I have heard some rather uncomfortable news.”

“What news?” Seeing a rare glimmer of annoyance on her husband’s face, she couldn’t resist smiling. “What news can throw you into such turmoil?”

Fan Xian sighed and forced a smile. “At the end of the year, Yan Xiaoyi is returning to the capital to report. I guess he will enter the capital around the same time as me.”

Yan Xiaoyi? The Viceroy to the North of Qing Kingdom, once the Commander of the Imperial Army, a famous ninth-rank super official of the Qing Kingdom...most importantly, he was the Eldest Princess’ trusted aide. He had a great reputation in the military. Even the Emperor would not act hastily to suppress him without sufficient evidence.

For such a figure to return to the capital, it would be inevitable that he would clash directly with Fan Xian.

Even to today, Fan Xian still remembered that shocking arrow he had met when he stole into the Royal Palace that year.

Wan’er furrowed her brows and said, “Is the...martial performance before the palace going to be resumed?”

Fan Xian glanced at her with shock and then smiled. Patting her head, he thought to himself that this wife’s instincts in this area were truly very sensitive. He nodded and said, “I heard it was the intention of the Bureau of Military Affairs. The military recommends resuming the martial performances as a way to rouse the morale of the people.”

“What did the Emperor say?” Wan’er was worried. She knew that Qing Kingdom was one that won their lands on horseback and had always placed a heavy importance on military merit. However, after three expeditions North, the Emperor decided to take care of his health in case of another battle. He had turned his gaze on civil governance and also stopped the important annual martial performance from many years ago.

“Naturally, the Emperor would not object.” Fan Xian smiled. “This is a good thing. The court is worried that after a long period of peace, even the Jiaozhou Navy would deteriorate. Naturally, they need an excuse to gather the support of the military.”

After Lin Wan’er was silent for a while, she suddenly opened her mouth and said, “I’m afraid...this is targeting you.”

“I am a civil official.” Fan Xian smiled as he spoke, but he clearly felt the glimmer of a problem in his mind. He thought differently about the Second Prince on Liujing River. The Second Prince thought that the Emperor had Fan Xian handle the Jiaozhou Navy matter as loosening his grip and allowing Fan Xian to contact and become familiar with military affairs. However, Fan Xian thought that that unyielding “father” was actually thinking the opposite. He had killed Chang Kun and framed Dang Xiaobo. Regardless of how the factions in the military were, it was likely that those generals all hated him in their hearts.

The Emperor still did not want the Commissioner of the Overwatch Council to gently stroke military power.

Wan’er watched him sigh and said, “You are a civil official...but you are also a world-famous martial ace.”

Fan Xian’s eyebrow rose and said, “Do you mean to say, that after Yan Xiaoyi returns to the capital, he will challenge me to a duel at the martial performance?”

Qing Kingdom was fond of fighting. Although the practice had become less common these years, the valiant spirit deeply entrenched in people’s hearts could not be wiped away. Just like how Ye Ling’er could challenge Fan Xian to a duel by throwing knives outside the side courtyard of the Royal Palace, dueling was still legal in Qing Kingdom. Furthermore, in such a context as the martial performance in front of the palace, no one wanted to refuse.

Fan Xian was willing to refuse. He smiled coldly and said, “So childish. Just because he wants to fight me, does that mean I have to fight him?”

In his heart, martial ability was used to kill people and not used for dueling and fighting. If he wanted to kill someone, Fan Xian had countless ways that were more effective and safe than dueling. Dueling was a childish game. Fan Xian suddenly felt that the Qing military was a bit childish and couldn’t help snorting disdainfully.

Wan’er sighed and warmly said, “Although this idea is the most direct and effective, it is very stupid...mother shouldn’t be stupid enough to have Yan Xiaoyi challenge you in the palace. Regardless of whether he wins or losses, Yan Xiaoyi would not dare to truly hurt you with the Emperor watching. I am also confused by the logic in this. Perhaps we are thinking about this wrong. Yan Xiaoyi is a Viceroy of the North, and it has been two years since he’s come back to the capital. It is time for him to make a report.”

A thought suddenly occurred to Fan Xian, and he furrowed his brows. If Yan Xiaoyi’s return to the capital this time had something to do with the so-called martial performance, then it proved that that power in the court was finally trying to challenge the might of the royal family head on. However, what was the Eldest Princess counting on?

“If I avoid the fight, it will weaken my reputation,” Fan Xian smiled slightly and said. “But as you know, I don’t care about this reputation.”

This was a lie, Fan Xian was someone who loved vanity. If it had been any other major general of the military challenging him in the martial performance, Fan Xian wouldn’t even blink before beating him until the other party wouldn’t even be recognizable to his mother and give his reputation another gilded edge. However, the person was Yan Xiaoyi.

Fan Xian searched his heart and knew that even though his injuries had long recovered wholly, and he also had the help of Haitang’s Heart of Tianyi Dao, and he stood firmly at the peak of the ninth-level, if he truly had to face a super ace who shocked the world with one arrow, he would still not gain an advantage.

He did have two people on his side who could stand against Yan Xiaoyi, Haitang and the Shadow. The problem was that it was impossible for these two people to attack for him.

He also had one other person who could easily defeat Yan Xiaoyi, Uncle Wu Zhu. The problem was that Uncle Wu Zhu had once again left home.

Amidst Fan Xian’s nervousness, he suddenly became mysteriously excited. His nose seemed to have smelled the salty and wet scent on the precipice. If after arriving in the capital and had to face Yan Xiaoyi face to face, if he didn’t use his little tricks, how far could he get?

Jingdou, thunder, ace, martial competition...these words tempted Fan Xian’s uneasy heart.

After he was silent for a while, he suddenly raised his head and smiled brightly. Warmly, he said, “I won’t fight, but...what if I tried to kill him?”

Wan’er’s eyes opened wide, and she was speechless for a moment.